• About
  • Contact
  • Features of our Family
  • My Plant Based Diet
  • Reviews of Places and Events
  • White Rabbit Photo Boutique

This Little Blog of Mine

This Little Blog of Mine

Tag Archives: adoption

Sometimes….

30 Tuesday Aug 2011

Posted by Momma J in The Family

≈ 8 Comments

Tags

adoption, transracial adoption

The other day I was trying to write a list post about the ten things I’ve learned about adoption.

I couldn’t do it.

You may have noticed I don’t write about adoption on this blog very often. Sometimes I feel like I should. There are a lot of people on the internet looking for information about adoption. I used to be one of them. I still am, most of the time. Sometimes though, I get tired of adoption on the blogosphere. I get tired of reading about it, I get tired of being asked about it, I get tired of thinking about it.

The thing is, I don’t ever feel like an adoptive momma. I feel like a momma-momma. I don’t go through the day looking at Little T, saying to myself, “there’s my adopted son”. I think, “there’s my son and I love him so much that I’d give my life for him.” When I think about adoption, I think of it as a part of him. I think about how I need to be sensitive as he gets older, so I can help him process everything. I think about his birth family as a part of his life that may come back someday, and how I can help him get through it. I think about ways to make sure he feels included in his birth culture. I think about these things as a momma who wants the best life she can give for her son because he has some special circumstances. Sure, the circumstances are unique to our family, but aren’t they always?

Sometimes I don’t want to read about adoption. Sometimes, this momma needs a break so she can go through the day without being being told that her son is her adoptive son, instead of her son, son.

a few birthday hike photos

09 Tuesday Aug 2011

Posted by Momma J in The Family, The Travels

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

adoption

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

06 Saturday Aug 2011

Posted by Momma J in The Family, The Travels

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

adoption, failed adoption

One year ago, Big T and I were hiking up to Rainbow Falls in the Eastern Sierra’s. Our trip was intended to help us get through the depression from our failed adoption. We were really struggling and our brains were swirling with unanswered questions. Would we ever be parents? How could we have been so taken advantage of with our first adoption? What was going to happen next? Our agency said we’d been the brunt of the worst adoption experience they’d ever seen, and it was taking it’s toll on us.

We were in need of some healing time, so we went up to the mountains. We’d planned a hike to Devil’s Postpile and Rainbow Falls. I’d never been there before, but I heard it was beautiful. The night before our hike, our social worker called. She said there was a little baby boy who was about to enter foster care, and would we be interested in being his parents? The only thing was that his birth mother wasn’t signed up for Medicaide, and we’d have to pay for her hospital bills. As much as we wanted to say yes, we simply couldn’t afford to do this. It was hard to tell them no, but there wasn’t any way for us to make that happen. Especially after we’d spent most of our savings on our failed adoption.

Before I went to sleep that night, I told Big T that I had a feeling it was all going to work out, and that Little T was meant to be our son. It was the same feeling I’d had when I met Big T, and I knew we were meant to be together. I didn’t know why I felt this way, especially since we’d already closed the book on this adoption and said no to our social worker.

The next day we hiked to Rainbow Falls and amazingly, our cell phone reception came through. When I saw the number of our social worker, I quickly answered the phone. She said the mother had signed up for Medicaide, and everything was taken care of and she just wanted to make sure that Little T was going to be in a good home. She asked if we were still interested in parenting, and with tears in our eyes we said yes! Yes, yes, yes!

During our experience, we often wondered, why us? Why couldn’t we get pregnant? Why did we have such a bad experience with our first adoption? Why did these things happen to us? The answer is simple, if we hadn’t gone through all of those things, we wouldn’t have Little T. He is the best thing that has ever happened to us. It’s hard when you’re going through a bad run to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but now we have the honor of seeing it every day. Every time Little T smiles at us, laughs with us, cuddles with us, plays with us. I’d go through everything ten times over, if it meant we’d have Little T by our side.

To celebrate our hike to Rainbow Falls, we did the hike again for Little T’s first birthday. This time we brought more family and birthday cake, and we had Little T with us.

And yes, we all cried.

Little T's Birthday Hike

Follow Me on Pinterest

Facebook

Facebook

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Categories

  • All Others
  • Escape Rooms
  • life
  • Meal Plans
  • Photography
  • Quick Snippets
  • The Adventures of Little T
  • The Family
  • The Travels
  • this and that
  • vegan

Top Mommy Blogs - Click To Vote!

Archives

  • June 2017
  • January 2017
  • September 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • November 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • April 2014
  • January 2014
  • December 2013
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • September 2013
  • August 2013
  • July 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013
  • April 2013
  • March 2013
  • February 2013
  • January 2013
  • December 2012
  • November 2012
  • October 2012
  • September 2012
  • August 2012
  • July 2012
  • June 2012
  • May 2012
  • April 2012
  • March 2012
  • February 2012
  • January 2012
  • December 2011
  • November 2011
  • October 2011
  • September 2011
  • August 2011
  • July 2011
  • June 2011
  • May 2011
  • RSS - Posts
  • RSS - Comments

Blog Hop

http://www.jmanandmillerbug.com

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

Cancel

 
Loading Comments...
Comment
    ×
    Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
    To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy